‘I have a PhD in child development but I’m a lazy parent and don’t play with my kid’


A mum with a PhD in child development has been sharing the “crazy” things she does with her daughter and has caused a stir with a recent social media post about ‘lazy parenting’

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Mum with PhD in child development says she’s actually a ‘lazy parent’ and doesn’t play with daughter

When it comes to children, the words lazy and parenting don’t often go together – as having kids can be a great deal of work.

From sleepless nights to potty training, keeping them entertained, and helping with homework there’s plenty to be getting on with.

But it’s only natural that with all this on your plate, you’d need a break and sometimes would want to take a step back from hands-on parenting.

One mum claims she has found a way to do this by subscribing to the “lazy parenting” ideology – and it’s actually not as bad as it sounds.

Dr. Kristyn Sommer, who has a PhD in child development, has built up a strong following on TikTok, sharing what she learned from her studies.

Dr Sommer has gone viral on TikTok


TikTok/ Dr Kristyn Sommer)

In a recent video, she proclaims she is a “super, super lazy parent” and explained why this is beneficial for her daughter, as it helps make her more independent.

She said: “I’m super, super lazy.

“Now, everyone’s lazy is different so this is my lazy.

“I subscribe to the term ‘lazy parenting’, which @scienceminded has a great post on so go look at that, but basically, I sit back and observe my child while she’s playing.

“I might set up an invitation or two, but that’s it. I try not to get involved and there’s a Montessori philosophy that is help as little as possible but as much as necessary and that really works well with the lazy parenting ideology.”

The mum continues to say: “I don’t want to have to constantly be entertaining my child. I’d like to observe her and help her when she needs, but not all the time.

“I also don’t interrupt her, and this is a really hard thing to do when you’re a parent, you might be like no that’s not how you play with it, let me show you. Interrupting them stops their workflow, they ‘re learning, when they’re failing. So that’s why I don’t interrupt her unless she asks for help and really needs it.

“What’s your lazy parenting tip?”

More than 33,000 people have watched the video so far, with thousands liking and commenting.

Many fellow parents were quick to praise Dr. Sommer for sharing this and admitted it made them feel better about the way they interact with their own children.

One person replied: “This makes me feel so much better about not always being on the floor with my baby. Some days I worry I’m not doing enough.”

Another wrote: “My daughter is 2.5, I do the lazy parenting as well, I let her explore her boundaries, I let her be creative and let her play by herself and do most by herself. As soon as she would ask for help, I would be the first to tell her how to solve the problem by herself.

“Often she manages and if she doesn’t I help her and involve her in the process and let her know what and home I’m doing, so next time she manages fine by herself. At 2.5 she is very independent and manages so many tasks by herself.”

Someone else posted: “Ours hasn’t improved with age. He’s five now, only child and needs entertaining all day. It’s exhausting.”

A different user added: “This is a relief to see. Parenting groups are FULL of parents constantly hands-on all day with organized activities. I’m just not that parent.”

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